Multiple times? And you’re just now getting around to thinking in terms of punishment? OK, so, if the behavior continues going forward (and in the absence of any meaningful consequences so far, I suspect it will) :
First offense: lines. Lots of them.
Second offense: corner time to reflect on something you’re going to tell them before sending them to the corner. And what you’re going to tell them is this: “The next time this happens, I’m going to release you. I am not joking. It is clear that you have no respect for my rules and no respect for me. I won’t be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t respect me. No more second chances. This behavior ends now.”
Third offense: “You’re released.” And you get on with your life.
Hey anon! I’m going to make a couple of assumptions and suggestions here:
First, if you’re only just now thinking about punishments for this infraction, either this rule doesn’t really mean that much to you, or you’ve tried other punishments and they haven’t worked. Because we don’t have that information, let’s address both.
If the rule doesn’t mean that much to you, why have it? If it’s because it’s part of the dress code, screw the dress code. Cookie cutter rules are great for cookies, but you sound like you might be humans. Also, is this a rule that’s going to work for her? Did you talk about it and explain why it’s important? Did you earn her buy-in?
Let’s assume that you’ve already tried other punishments. Which ones? Did you spank her? That could be a part of the problem right there: the whole thing might be foreplay for her, or a way to get the spanking she wants. If you tried non-impact punishments like lines or corner time and that still didn’t work, maybe there’s other areas where you need to tighten the leash in order for her to feel your presence.
Any rule is only worth what you put into enforcing it, and what your sub puts into following it. If it’s a must have for you, then you need to have a serious conversation with her. If it’s just something you do because that’s what people do? Chuck it and stick to the ones that matter to you.
Actually, may I please say something?
If it was one of those things where she asked, and you never answered, you might wanna make it clear that just because she asked, doesn’t mean she’s allowed to play without a firm yes from you. If that’s the route you want to go down, and if that’s a situation that happened.
Cause, ya know… Loopholes and us not knowing the full story.
Right, which is why I often harp on having a set of “sensible defaults” in place …
“If you send me a list of panties to select from and I don’t respond in 15 minutes, commando is the default.”
“If you send me a request for an orgasm and I don’t respond in 30 minutes, ‘permission denied’ is the default.”
It requires a bit of thinking about the rules one has put in place, but it saves one’s sub a hell of a lot of anxiety and you can rest knowing you’ve plugged up any potential for loopholes etc.
Worth a reblog to educate others regarding the importance of communication, rules, respect and proper corrective punishment
Sharp Dressed Dom 